Posts Tagged ‘fantasy’

Gutscrape Infestation?

Lost your lucky rabbit’s foot?

Sure you put that Hand of Glory on the shelf?

Are eyes of newt missing when you’re sure you’ve stocked up?

You might have a GUTSCRAPE!

Gutscrapes can be an expensive problem for hard-working thaumaturgists like YOU.

Don’t fear – we at Catchett & Sons can help.

Hatched from the lingering aura of humilation and extended exposure to occult energies on a gobbet of blood or phlegm, gutscrapes are commonly found in the laboratories of necromancers and demonologists. Be warned, they CAN crop up in almost ANY willworkers’ sacred space. Both individuals and swarms have been recorded at shamanic lodges, mechanist workshops, occultech labs and clerical retreats. Agile shapechangers, larval gutscrapes squeeze under doors and through keyholes, sniffing out and then devouring YOUR expensive alchemical ingredients.

The first sign of a gutscrape infestation is missing talismans, tokens and other ingredients. Catch them that early and they’re no more a problem than stinkrats or dire lice. Wait and before you know it, the vermin has grown fat on YOUR property. Adults quickly gain an appetite for more powerful and unique artifacts. YOUR artifacts.

Gutscrapes can not only deplete your lab’s resources. Fully grown, their toxic aura can spread peevishness, ignominy and misery throughout your cabal.

How can we help? Our expert operatives will:

  • LOCATE and STERILISE gutscrape nests.
  • INNOCULATE your lab against further infestations.
  • SECURE your space.

Write, visit or etherwave us at our premises on Fell Street.

Catchett & Sons are specialists in occult vermin, rogue devils, SSSBs (SemiSentient Spellcasting Byproducts) and occult security. Registered as such with local authorities.


The fine folks at Nevermeet Press do a lot of crowdsourcing for D&D products. I’d completely forgotten how much fun it was to write up gonzo monsters. Unfortunately, my entry didn’t place, but the ones that did were deserving. There’s some juicy writing there.